Thursday 30 October 2014

Never Do This, It's Stupid And Dangerous

"Live every day as if it were going to be your last; for one day you're sure to be right." Harry 'Breaker' Harbord Morant

The young have no fear and think they are immortal, hence their propensity to do things that are stupid and/or dangerous.  I remember that when I was at school we would satirise the public safety films that appeared on TV and at the cinema by making up bizarre activities and saying, in our best Alvar Lidell[1] tones, "Never do this, it's stupid and dangerous." As we grow older we ought to grow wiser and more cautious, but how often have you heard people remark that age is just a number and that while physically they may be 40 or 50, mentally they feel the same as they did when they were 18 or 20? Naturally most people in their 40's or 50's become acutely aware of their actual age when they attempt some physical activity that they pursued with ease three decades before, but that does not stop those of us in that age group from still feeling relatively young. In fact people are generally "younger" today than they were fifty years or more ago and if that sounds odd, look around you.

Never do this, it's stupid and dangerous.

Back in the days when I was a child, people of my grand-parents' generation looked old and behaved old; their dress, their habits, their taste in music were of their time. Nowadays there is a greater democracy in dress and in musical tastes, in the hobbies people pursue. But as much as we may be wearing skinny jeans and playing Grand Theft Auto while listening to One Direction[2] there is one inescapable fact, one immutable law of nature that we cannot avoid; we are all getting older, although I have often remarked, somewhat flippantly, that this is preferable to the alternative.

50 in 1950...
...and today


Thoughts of my own mortality have come to the fore in recent months after a number of visits to the doctor and hospital. Personally I try to avoid going to either the doctor or hospital if at all possible, you never know what you might pick up.  Some years ago I went to my doctor, worried over some sharp pains I was experiencing in my left arm, and although I am by no means a hypochondriac, I do sometimes fear the worst when this sort of thing happens. Happily the doctor found no physical problems and told me it was stress related. In answer to my question as to what I should do, his answer was short and useless: "Eliminate the cause of your stress," he said. As I was not in a position to give up work at the time, his advice had to go unheeded, but proving that the physical signs were psychosomatic, once I realised that that this was the case, the symptoms disappeared.

Since then, the removal of my wisdom teeth and a wart like growth on my tongue apart (I admit that did give me some sleepless nights because it could have been a lot more serious; fortunately a biopsy revealed it to be benign), I have been relatively incident free on the health front. By the by, one does appreciate that one is aging when one's dentist says, "You have good teeth...for a man of your age," which gave me pause for thought as I had never thought of myself as a man of my age before. But anyway, to the matter in hand, which all began with a seemingly innocuous phone call from the doctor's surgery, who were targeting "men of my age" for health MOT's. Off I trotted, fairly confident that all would be well and that I would leave with a ringing endorsement of my lifestyle. Now I admit that I had had a recurrence of a somewhat delicate issue that I had been to the doctors about before, so perhaps I was a little stressed, but whatever the reason, my blood pressure was so high that I feared that I was going to be hospitalised there and then!  Admitting to my delicate issue resulted in more prodding and poking from my doctor than I was especially comfortable with, especially when she produced  a latex glove and some lubricant, and I left the surgery with instructions to make an appointment for a scan and to have a blood test.

Never do this...


Fortunately my problem cleared up (touch wood) because my doctor told me that the next investigative step would be a lot more invasive, and neither the scan nor the blood test had detected any abnormalities worthy of concern (apart from a cyst on a kidney and slightly enlarged prostate - like most men my age I would imagine) but my blood pressure remained elevated and my cholesterol level was similarly high enough to require treatment so I was given prescriptions to deal with both. In addition I was instructed to drink less, stop smoking and eat more healthily. I was tempted to ask, "Will that make me live longer?" to which the only appropriate answer is, "No, it will just seem longer." So the consumption of alcohol has been reduced, the smoking has stopped and I am trying to eat more healthily, although as I have always considered my diet to be reasonably good, this healthy eating regime largely entails trying to reduce the consumption of crisps and chocolate, with the emphasis on trying.   

...or this...

Now I am not critical of my doctor's advice, nor am I saying that the Amlodipine and Simvastatin that I have been prescribed are not necessary, but I am not convinced that all treatments are essential and that the benefits many people are gaining from life-long prescriptions may well be marginal. Take Zantac for instance, a treatment for ulcers produced by Glaxo-SmithKline (GSK) which is prescribed for long periods of use. For purely commercial reasons GSK began marketing Zantac to sufferers of heartburn by condition branding their product to consumers on the basis that heartburn was a precursor to ulcers. According to many people (including my dentist, who explained this to me recently), a short course of antibiotics can clear up the problem without recourse to years of taking Zantac, but of course publicising that type of thing is not in the drug companies interests.

...or this.


Apparently around a third of the population of the England have high blood pressure, but around 5 million in the UK are undiagnosed, which if my doctor is to be believed, is 5 million people with increased risk of premature death from heart attack or stroke. No doubt many of these are the morbidly obese people I see waddling around wolfing down cheeseburgers, guzzling super-sized soft drinks and smoking like the proverbial chimney.

When I first started taking my tablets I must confess I felt a bit depressed about it, but having spoken to a number of my friends it would appear that I was in something of a minority when I wasn't taking them and everyone seems to think it is no big deal. The thing is that while it is wise to cut out or at least cut down on the things that are bad for you and sensible to do the things that are good for you, you can be the healthiest man on the planet and still walk outside and get hit by a bus.





[1] If you are under 50 (or not English) you will probably need to read this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alvar_Lidell
[2] Not me personally, apart from the jeans.

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